Meeting Aunt May
by The True Myth
Summary: Request for Wade meeting Aunt May, it's very short, but I tried. Established Spideypool, rating for language,


**This was written as a prompt suggested by instagram user your_bucky_ , for Wade meeting Aunt May.**

 **I do not own the characters used and the plot was suggested by the IG user above, however I did add my own little things, like writing it.**

 **Warnings: Language, OOCness,**

 **Enjoy!**

– –

"She's going to hate me." He said for at least the twentieth time that afternoon, he looked in the mirror, taking in his ragged and worn appearance that was masked by a nice shirt and dress jacket.

His long time boyfriend, Peter, glared up at him from their bed, watching the larger male carefully as he struggled with the tie. He stood up, walking over and moving his hands away, kissing his chin with a sigh before he began to fiddle with the black tie. "She's not going to hate you, dork." He rolled his eyes.

"Yes, she will. Why would anyone want their baby nephew dating a psycho like me?" Wade groaned, watching his beautiful baby boy. He and Peter had dated over two years before May Parker decided it was high time for her to meet the elusive boyfriend.

Peter had invited his aunt back to his and Wade's tiny apartment for dinner, and while Wade spent a good few hours bitching and pouting about that, he spent even more time upset about the fact that while Peter cooked, Wade had to deep clean everything, and by everything he meant EVERYTHING.

The bathroom wasn't the worst of it, Peter did good keeping that and the kitchen clean since he wasn't about to shower or cook in a dirty space. The bedroom and living room however was a hot mess and Wade was the only one able to blame. Whenever Peter got around to nagging the elder man to clean, Wade would sweep him off of his feet, retreating to where ever was close enough to fuck the daylights out of his little lover.

Peter glanced up, staring at his boyfriend, he knew Wade was insecure, with his skin, his job, his voice and the voices in his head. He often told Peter there was so much better however to Peter... Wade was perfect.

"Wade, she won't hate you." He said softly, getting up on his tip toes to kiss the taller male, he caressed the man's scarred and textured cheek. "She's the most accepting woman I've ever met, just breath baby, it'll be okay." He smiled, hoping that Wade could just breath and be calm, to take some of Peter's calmness.

Wade took a deep breath and nodded, tucking a strand of hair behind Peter's ear. "Anything for you beautiful."

Peter grinned and kissed him deeply, Wade's hands snaking around his hips, one hand reaching out to grasp his plump rear. One hand was as large as one of Peter's ass cheeks.

For a moment they remained in the kiss, their bodies pressed together as Wade slowly moved to press his tiny lover to the wall, giving the shorter a chance to get some height.

Peter pulled away, panting softly and staring up with his chocolate eyes half lidded, Wade could recognize the oncoming look of lust.

"I need to finish the meatballs." He whispered, Wade mentally cursed, wishing that Peter would just strip and let Wade take control of that perfect body. "and you... need to clean." He smirked and pecked his lips before walking off, fixing himself up and going to clean the kitchen up and finish his spaghetti and meatballs, then he pushed the garlic cheesy bread into the oven. He sighed happily and looked up as his boyfriend struggled to figure the vacuum out. He assumed that the man hadn't been a big cleaner before his relationship with Peter.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and put some music on, humming along as the sound of Melanie Martinez filled their small apartment. He knew it wasn't as big as what the couple could have, but he liked it... it felt nice for them to have this tiny space and of course he had left his mark on the place.

He watched Wade trip and fall over the vacuum cord and laughed loudly, walking over and helping him up before sitting on his chest, ignoring the carpet and just kissing him, Wade's hands ghosting on his hips and ass.

The couple remained there, not caring that they had to clean and that his Aunt was coming any moment.

The timer rung and he groaned softly, Peter sitting up. "Clean the vacuum up, the carpets fine, then help me set the table." He kissed Wade once more before getting up and quickly pulling the bread out.

Wade watched his little lover, a grin on his face. Perhaps with Peter by his side this wasn't going to be so bad.

– –

Finally the house was ready by the time that there was a gentle knock on the door, Peter smiled brightly and pulled his oven mitt off, kissing Wade's cheek as he passed before pulling open the door.

There she stood, smaller but defiantly not frail, which surprised Wade, he figured she would be some tiny little weak woman but she looked like the sassiest grandmother alive. He smirked, walking forward as May Parker hugged her nephew.

"Hello there Peter." she said, looking around. "My my, what a nice little place you have... and you must be Wade." She walked over to the very large male.

Wade stared down at May, giving her a strange little half hug. "Yeah I am, Mrs. Parker, I'm the man who sleeps with your nephew." Peter glared at his boyfriend, unable to believe that sentence left Wade's mouth but to his surprise, May just laughed.

"I'm sure you are, Peter honey, why don't you show me around?" Peter nodded, walking with the sixty year old with a smile.

Wade let out a breath. "Fucking hell!" He grumbled, well.. .strike one, he defiantly was not getting sex tonight because of what he had just said. This was why he was so worried, he always managed to say the wrong things and he didn't want to fuck this relationship.

Peter showed his aunt, his only real family around the tiny apartment, his aunt a little impressed, she had heard how messy Wade Wilson was as a person, but she noticed how clean the house was.

She snickered when they entered the bedroom, it was covered head to toe in posters, pictures and other mementos of their love life. She saw Peter's camera by the bed and smiled. "Well its a very nice house sweetie," She said, kissing Peter's head. "But I'm pretty hungry." that and Wade forgot to put the sex toys away and she could see them under the bed. Peter nodded and lead her back to their makeshift dining room, t was actually just a table beside the kitchen. He tried his best.

Wade smiled sheepishly, putting everything on the table, they were going to an Italian night, the best they could at least. He pulled the chair out for May, trying to be a gentlemen. Peter nodded, at least he was doing that right.

For a moment it was awkward, Wade on his best behavior while Peter was hoping that May liked Wade while May just wanted some food.

She reached over and took a slice of garlic bread, smiling. "Well come on boys, eat up." She said, feeling more like the mother to Peter than she ever had been before.

Peter flushed, getting some pasta and sauce then followed by his lover. He just wanted this all to go well, he really wanted his Aunt to approve of his boyfriend.

– –

As they ate, no one really spoke until May glanced up. "So what do you do for a living Wade?" She finally asked, Peter bit his lip... she wouldn't like it if he just up and said 'I kill people...'

"I... um..." Wade thought a moment. She laughed, shaking her head.

"Well I assume its some of that hero stuff, since that's what Peter's been up to." Peter choked on his pasta.

"H-How the heck do you know about that?" He gagged, shocked that she knew. He had kept his secret so well!

She laughed sweetly, "Honey you could never keep secrets from me." She said, putting a hand on his cheek, "I found your suit dear."

Wade laughed, watching his flustered boyfriend. "Well Petey, looks like you can't hide anything from momma bear!" He joked. Peter rolled his eyes, kicking the man under the table.

"Oh he never could, he always thought he was being so quiet when he snuck out, but I'm not a fool, I can hear him." Peter groaned, hitting his head on the table.

Wade figured he liked the old bat, she was pretty cool.

The duration of dinner consisted of May telling Wade every embarrassing story there was to tell about Peter from the time Peter put on a fashion show with him dressing in all of her dresses and playing with her makeup, including pictures to show, to the time she caught Peter trying to flirt with a boy at school and the man kissed him in front of everyone, this was middle school, so Peter had been beyond embarrassed.

Peter groaned softly, "Aunt May I'm sure there's better things to do than talk about my crazy childhood." She smirked.

"Nonsense Peter, I brought the video from your fashion show, I'm sure Wade would love to see it."

Peter knew this dinner was a bad idea.

– –

Two hours, one dessert and drink round later they had finished the hellish movie, putting Peter ina spot that now his boyfriend wanted nothing more than to see his little lover in drag. Sexy drag this time though.

The two were laughing their heads off at Peter's childhood and Peter just laid his head in Wade's lap, wanting to die. Wade smiled down at him. "Hey Petey, don't worry beautiful." He smiled and kissed him softly. May sighed happily... She knew that Peter was embarrased but she was just beyond happy to see him finally in love, with a safe man, with a man he could be himself with.

"Well boys, it's been very fun, we should do this again, but I do have to go, I have a yoga class tomorrow and I don't want to be late." She stood, Peter going to get her some leftovers to take home.

He walked his aunt to the door, smiling just slightly. She turned and hugged him.

"Thanks for coming over Aunt May." He said softly, hugging her back. She was his only family and he was always thankful to have her there with him. She kissed his head.

"Peter, he's a keeper." She said, he was confused as he looked down at her. She just grinned, "You're happy... that's all that matters." She said her goodbyes to Wade and left.

"So that went well." Wade grinned brightly, watching his younger boyfriend. Peter closed the door and stared at him. "When do I get to see that perky ass in drag?" Wade purred, pinning Peter to the wall.

So the night didn't go as expected, he had all his horribly funny memories exposed, but to see his Aunt excepting of Wade and to see Wade proud of himself... it was kind of worth it.

He sighed and rolled his eyes before wrapping his arms around the taller's neck. "Maybe tonight if you hurry up and clean." He purred, kissing him slowly.

Wade's eyes got large and he rushed off to clean...

Worth it.

– –

 **So... I kind of lost where I was going halfway through... sorry.**

 **Review please!**


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